It's a good house, a good home. My babies have grown into children here and when we leave it, I will most definitely feel more than a little nostalgic.
But it's time.
At least I think it is- emphasis on the me part of that statement.
We've simply outgrown this place and while I completely understand that this is a first world kind of problem, I have an idea- a vision maybe- of how I would like to use our home to host teenagers and dinner parties and out of town guests and it just seems like there might be something out there that would be better suited to our upcoming and current activities and ministries and goings-on.
All that being said, while I think it's time, it must not be God's best time for us because as of yet, we haven't gotten an offer. We've shown it 34 times so..... we've had plenty of looking, just not the right buyer. I've tried not to complain, but I have to admit I'm guilty.
However, there is a two-fold lesson to be learned and thanks to be given. This is my testimony in the midst of a house unsold.
1. God does not hate me. When you have to clean a house to the point that it is spotless and uncluttered 34 times when you're trying to run a household full of kids, a little doubt might slip into your mind and you might think that maybe this is some sort of cruel joke. But it's quite the opposite. God loves me and my family with unmerited and immeasurable Father love. He loves us. It is nothing for him to bring a buyer to our house, but I have to believe that because he loves us, He hasn't. It's not for lack of prayer (oh, we've prayed) and it's not for lack of effort (oh, we've tried). It's just because His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. His timing is always, always, always the right timing. There is great protection in staying within His boundaries of love.
2. Living in the in-between gives you a good and true framework in which to live. In Hebrews 11, it says that "By faith [Abraham] made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God." (Hebrews 11: 9-10)
I may not be living in a tent, but my proverbial heels haven't been dug in here. This house isn't as it would be if I knew I were spending the rest of my life here. It reminds me that I am indeed an alien and a stranger in this world as it is now. It reminds me to look forward to the Day when all things are made new and our permanent everlasting-life home is revealed.
So there it is. In the midst of a house unsold, I give thanks for the lessons and for the Lord knowing what's best for me and my first world problems.